roses and thorns.

ok. so confession time.

it is 10:37, wednesday evening {hump day, evening?, if you will}, and i have a complete essay to write and i just cannot. we have had a little longer than a month to write this lovely essay on the equally lovely book "as i lay dying" {sarcasm on the 'lovely'? why yes. also, read the book in high school....we called it 'as i die reading'. true story. luckily with an actual qualified teacher the book made more sense this time around and was actually somewhat enjoyable. still, it had some moments of 'dying reading'. my apologies mr. faulkner} anyway and in true 'kate' fashion i have procrastinated till the end..its due next tuesday. if there is one thing i win at in life it is my procrastination skills. really, they are awesome. but anyway tomorrow is the last day my professor will read drafts and as this is worth 25% of our grade, i really think it is a good idea. plus some overachievers {slash people i wish i were right now} have already sent him 4 and 5 different drafts. seriously. i have one page down. essay: 1 kate: 0. its beating my butt. i was excited about this essay in the beginning. i actually do enjoy writing and so initially welcomed this assignment with an open heart, but now, especially after composing an email to my education class advisor discussing the 2nd grade class i teacher aid in, all i want to do is share more about that class. not discuss the characters in a.i.l.d which exude signs of heroism.

in case you did not know, i am in the teacher certification program here at gonzaga, and am currently enrolled in a class which requires a field experience where once a week i get to dress up in cute teacher clothes {including heels. splurged last week on some adorable red little heels}, and spend and hour and a half on tuesdays with little 7 and 8 year olds. the school i am at is a title one school, meaning it has many impoverished and at risk students. 61% students are on free or reduced lunches. it is a complete 180 from the elementary school i attended. many of these students do not have a steady home life; many do not even have permanent homes.

here is an excerpt from the email i sent my advisor relaying my one of my experiences with these students from the first two weeks:

...This week was just as good. The day was started with a little girl, Melina, asking what the empty milk carton was for, which was sitting on a desk. When i told her it was a penny drive for children who werein need, she said in her tiny voice, 'when i get my allowance, im going to give it all to the carton'.when i told her how nice andgenerous that was, she answered back saying how her family was 'broke' and how they had been 'broke' for a while. I then noticed the holes in her long sleeved shirt, as she mentioned she hasn't had new clothes in a while. It made such a huge impact on me, that this little girl, one, knew her family was having financial troubles, and two, still thought togive her allowance to the penny carton....

incredible right? right after that, a little boy said he was going to put a whole twenty dollars in the carton. the selfless spirit of these kids is so uplifting.

after just 2 times with these kids, they have touched me and i can say it is easily one of my most favorite times of the week, if not my favorite.

i am still not 100% sure if teaching is the career i want for myself. i still go back and forth with i don't really know what but i don't like the idea of pigeon-holing myself so soon into one career, even if it is one i know i could be extremely happy with. i feel like i need time to explore others. the problem is the education program here is so specialized i don't really have time to explore. its not a major so i have to pick a major, meet all those requirements and then meet all the requirements of the cert. program. so its pretty hectic. oh well.

anyway:

my secret dream job of the week? wedding photographer.

how cool to get to experience this every time you go to work??

found here

ok. i suppose it is time to get back to my essay. i have a feeling it is going to be a late night for me. oh joy.

also a girl in my class (college, not elementary) shared that her class (elementary, not college) went around and did 'roses and thorns' each morning: the good and bad about their previous day. so today:

rose: got a lovely late valentines day letter in the mail from my little blue devil. read it twice i loved it so much.

also. it snowed a lot. {it makes our campus look so cute}

thorn: my essay. meaning a late night and i am tired. and sick. spring break hurry up please? :)

also. it snowed a lot. {i am starting to forget what warmth feels like}

my apologies for this insane monster of a post.

again basically its for me. but then again, partly for you if you find my random procrastination influenced thoughts interesting.

love to you.

to be continued.

photographs and memories.

i absolutely love pictures.

i am always the annoying one asking a waiter to snap a picture of the dinner group or the mom-like person who gathers the group for a picture, at sometimes the most inopportune times. my friends can attest to this. {i can feel i am totally going to be the annoying mom who has the camera in her kids' faces all the time. funny thing is as a kid i hated that.}

however i always know that i'll be glad i did. and because of this i have tons and tons of pictures saved on my computer. i don't think this is necessarily a unique thing to have or to like, but after ordering new prints a couple of days ago it was reaffirmed at how great pictures are.

when shutter-fly notified me through email my pictures had been delivered i literally jumped up from my bed and practically ran to the mailroom eager to get there before it closed.

it was seriously like christmas. {although whenever you have mail in college its like christmas}

i then decided to reorganize my pictures in my room, adding to the collection and taking some down..just as a refresher.

it was so much fun. :)

{part of the board}

{pardon the messy bed}

oh and also? spokane officially cannot decide on its weather. talk about bipolar. today it was snowing while it being sunny and partly cloudy out. weird? yes. i kept saying it felt like those old movies where the snow looks fake, because the screen is odly lit up. does that make sense? i don't know but thats what it felt like and it was very confusing. i think im ready for it to be spring.

you cant really tell, but this was taken right now and it was snowing:

and lastly some girls in my hall and i went out on saturday for a pre-valentines girls dinner. we all dressed up and ate white cheddar and apple salads, bruschetta and sipped on our waters with lemon.

it was very classy.

such a relaxing, fun dinner.

{until we called the taxis too soon and the drivers got ansy waiting while we dealt with the checks. it was a bit uncomfortable.}

that is all.

love to you this week. xo

{inspiration for title? see jason reeves. my fav singer}

to be continued.

st. valentine.

"all you need is love"

this short phrase containing merely 5 words is perhaps {in my humble opinion} the most influential phrase to be ever spoken or i guess sang in the english language. and why? because its true. don't try to argue. i think love is the only thing in the entire universe that everyone is looking for and is also something that can not fully be explained....or in the very least people have many different definitions. how do you know what love really is? how is it defined? it seems as if there are varying degrees like some classics: puppy love, first love, everlasting love, true love.... is there a difference between loving something or someone, and being in love? shouldn't love, well, just be love, plain and simple? humans have made our entire world complicated, and i feel like, over time, we have made love complicated as well.

i feel like until you find 'the one', people always question if they love the person they are with, or if it a simply an infatuating lust. you know you love your family, and you know you love your friends....so shouldn't you be able to tell just as easily if you love your significant other? why do people find it so hard?

valentines day is a day completely devoted to this complex emotion, and living in a hall filled with 50 girls there has been some discussion about it...to say the least. most of it is discussion filled with hatred and resentment....complete opposite ideas than probably intended by ol' st. valentine.

i however, love this holiday. maybe its commercial or even silly, but its still one day out of all 365 in a year completely dedicated to honoring the ones you love, be it a significant other or a friend....something that is surprisingly hard to do in our every day busy lives. i love the idea of love. therefore i love valentines day and always will.

and because i love it so much i decorated...naturally:

{love}

{our mirror decorations. some dino love}

{our door}

i hope this finds you in happiness, health and love...most of all love. xoxo

and...although a couple days early, i hope you have a fantastic valentines day loving the people in your life!

to be continued.